Lindsey's Blog

Thursday, June 15, 2006


Last night I re-watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, which is such a good movie! I loved it in the theatre and I still love it. Anyways, Kate Winlet's character says something about obsessing over not living life to the fullest, not taking advantage of the short amount of time that we have. And I thought Yes! Yes, that is how I feel so often. My life is generally so awesome, and I am so very lucky, yet I have many regrets. Regrets from every "era" of my life--college, high school, back until I can't remember anymore. And almost everyone of them is something I wish I should have done, some new experience I should have given myself. And just generally, I should have gone out more. It is so hard for me to get motivated to go out when I'm tired, or I feel ugly, or something stupid like that. And I decided I don't want to waste time doing things that aren't fun. And for five minutes I resolved that I would only do things that I was super enthusiastic about, that sounded like the funnest (most fun?) or most meaningful time ever. But then I realized, OK, that is not possible. Or even desirable. Like working isn't the best time ever, but there are things about it that are rewarding and enjoyable, and it enables me to have money so that I can do other fun things. Blogging isn't the best time ever, but it is something small that is fun. I like it. I don't want to stop doing it. Or volunteering. Every volunteer experience isn't going to be the most meaningful ever, but that doesn't mean I should volunteer less. So I decided instead to just try to do more things that are special and fun and meaningful and important, but they don't have to be the best ever. Also, I decided I miss acting a lot. Doing a show is not really possible with my job right now, but someday when I'm older I feel I will get back into it, and I need to be ready for that. And one last thought I had--what is the point of doing stuff that is bad for me, unless it is really worth it? Eating junk food is not fun enough to shorten my life over it. Ocassionally smoking isn't fun enough to shorten my life over it. Duh! So here are my summer resolutions:

1. Always be reading something--especially read more plays and more non-fiction

2. Get up and get ready everyday like something is going to happen; if nothing seems to be going on, find something to do

3. Plan more social stuff--I'm not talking just about big parties; I like having dinner parties, and I want movie night, and game night!

4. Go out to the theatre more often--live theatre and the movies

5. Get to know my town more, and find fun things to do here

7. Organize and streamline house/affairs so boring things like chores are done as quickly and as easily as possible

8. Only spend money on things that seem really worthwhile

9. Continue to exercise and eat healthily every single day

10. Get enough sleep during the week; don't oversleep on the weekends

11. Start volunteering outside of Community Outreach Committee at work

12. Find new hobby or learn something new...Spanish...guitar...sewing? I haven't decided yet.

13. Go to the pool more often--difficult resolution, I know. But seriously, the pool is the social center of my neighborhood, but I've only gone there once because I haven't made time to go and relax and hang out with my friends

14. Find cool stuff to do on every work trip

Well, I really wanted the list to be under 10, but that's not too bad. I'm seriously gonna check back soon and see how I'm doing.

Update: I am adding one more--15. Quit biting my nails! It is gross, and I probably look stupid with my hands in front of my face all the time--break out the nail polish!


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